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Don’t wait till you’re married to learn these 7 habits

Don’t wait till you’re married to learn these 7 habits

In a broader sense, this is an advice on how to know your limits in a relationship depending on how far you and a partner have gone.

I once came across a quote on twitter which essentially said “Don’t do husband stuff for a boyfriend.”

In a broader sense, this is an advice on how to know your limits in a relationship depending on how far you and a partner have gone.

It should not be taken as a statement which completely separates relationships from marriages because as you surely know, relationships graduate into marriages and there are things you need in a marriage that should be learnt and imbibed even before you and your partner take your wedding vows.

We list seven of these things below:

1. Say “I love you” all the time

Start now. Don’t get tired even when you get married.

2. Know how to keep distance

Realise that there are moments when people are overcome with emotion and would rather be left alone than pressured into talking.

If you want to have a great marriage, learn to spot these moments now that you are still with your girl/boyfriend.

3.  Always surprise each other

Never stop planning little surprises for him, popping in at his work with lunch, picking up his favourite candy from the store and getting his car washed for him when he’s sleeping in, just because.

4. Don’t accuse, ask

Learn to say David, did you leave this food in the sink?” rather than, “You left stuff in the sink again didn’t you?!”

5. Willingness to help your partner

Don’t close your eyes to your boyfriend’s needs just because he’s not yet your husband. Don’t say,  when I marry I will freely give to my wife. If you can’t do it now, you might not be able to do it then.

6. Make peace with what you can’t change

If your partner keeps doing something and although you keep complaining they can’t seem to  stop it, it might be time to accept that you can’t change them.

Life, and your marriage later will be easier if you accept that and learn to  live with it.

 
7. Faithfulness

I’ve heard people say “people are not particularly exclusive until they are married.”

But if everyone in a relationship goes by this rule and cheats because they are not married yet,’ just how convenient would it be when they are married and they have to abruptly stop?

Better to learn that exclusiveness now that you are with your girlfriend. Don’t wait till you are married.

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Nick Cannon spotted on dinner date with another ex, Christina Milian

Last week Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey sparked rumors they were back together after they were spotted having dinner together three nights in a row. Maybe that is not happening as Nick was spotted with another one of his exes, Christina Millian. The two were spotted leaving Sugarfish in LA.

Nick and Christina dated for nearly two years after meeting on the set of Love Don’t Cost a Thing back in 2003 and broke up after Nick Cannon cheated.

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News

Man allegedly batters wife with hammer in Akwa Ibom, kicks her out in middle of the night

According to a report shared on Adovate group, Due Process’ Facebook page by Prince Abubakar Aphyz, a violent  husband battered his wife, Mrs Ntienseobot Anietimfon Ekere with hammer and threw her out in the middle of the night. The couple is said to have been married for 20 years and have 5 children.
He allegedly bribed the police and got his wife arrested. The Facebook user wrote;

”This is Mrs Ntienseobot Anietimfon Ekere of 1, Udo Umoh close, Off Udo ikpe street, Off Nwaniba road, Uyo. Akwa Ibom state. She was battered by her hubby(domestic violence).

‘Her husband hit her head with hammer, and threw her out at an ungodly hour of the night. The worst part is, they’ve been married for 20yrs, with 5children. This man arrested the wife because he had bribed the police after treating her like a dog. We want justice for this woman. What can this group to fight for her?”
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The woman allegedly pregnant for married Carmelo Anthony

Carmelo and La La Anthony have separated and there were later reports that it was because he got his side chick pregnant. A reader sent the below message to TheShade Room to shed more light on who the woman is

“I have the real scoop on Carmelo and Lala’s breakup because I used to live with the girl!Mia met Carmelo at Room Seven, a club in Chicago when he was here for the NBA draft doing press.

She was traveling back and forth to New York while she was [allegedly] messing around with Ryan Henry from Black ink Chicago.
She’s not a stripper, she’s a graduate student from Northwestern University with a masters in education. She works in education setting up programs.
Carmelo wasn’t taking her serious to the point where she started to buy her own plane tickets to go see him.
Before she was pregnant, we fell out because she was late on rent and Carmelo wasn’t giving her anything, then all of a sudden she ended up pregnant.
I didn’t have a real issue with her until her mom started [allegedly] sending dms telling people her gay friend took her debt card…how you steal a bank card with nothing on it?

 

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Relationship

Married couple discover they are biological twins after DNA test

Dailymail UK reports that the couple had been trying to conceive. It was when they visited a fertility clinic, and were going through a vitro fertilisation process that the doctor discovered there are too many similarities in their DNA profiles. The twins had been separated at a young age after their biological parents died in a car accident. They were adopted by two different families, in which none of them knew their adopted child had a twin.

The couple could not hide their shock, as marriage between siblings is a criminal act in the southern state. The unnamed couple had met and fallen in love in college. “They were attracted to each other due to their similarities. They felt they could really connect with each other. If only they had known the truth, it could have saved them so much pain later on. For me, it’s a particularly unusual case because my job is all about helping couples conceive a child. This is the first time in my career that I’ve been glad I haven’t succeeded in that regard,” the doctor told Mississippi Herald. The penalty for marrying a sibling in Mississippi is up to 10 years in prison and a fine of $500.

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Woman attacks with machette her one-year-old nephew to death, seriously injures another

A one-year old boy was killed and his five year old brother hospitalized after their aunt attacked them with a machete in Nyamonema village, Kisii County, Kenya on Wednesday, April 12th.

The woman attacked the two siblings as they played outside their grandmother’s house. She allegedly slashed the minors several times, killing the younger one on the spot and seriously injuring the older sibling.

Ms Elizabeth Bosire, the children’s grandmother, told Nation that she had gone to pick tea at her farm when she was disturbed by the distress calls of her grandchildren.

“I heard my grandchildren crying while calling for me and immediately dropped my basket to run home and find out what the problem was. I was just on time to find my daughter-in-law hacking my grandson on the head with a machete,” a tearful Ms Bosire said.

She screamed in a bid to ward off the attack and the assailant then fled the scene, leaving her to attend to the child who was bleeding profusely.

“I screamed and pleaded with my daughter to stop killing my grandchildren. At that point, she stopped and ran off, allowing me to pick up my grandchild and try to assist him. I took off my jacket and wrapped it around his head in an effort to stop the bleeding, and started running towards the road as I called on neighbours to help us,” said Ms Bosire.
The grandmother, together with her daughter Ms Lydia Kemunto, carried the two boys to the main road in an attempt to get help from neighbours.
“Together, we ran to the road and screamed as we sought our neighbours’ assistance. They assisted us rush the children to Kisii Teaching and Referral Hospital,” said Msbo
Lydia Kemunto, the children’s mother, recounted the painful final moments of her son’s life.

“I was in the farm tending to my maize crop when I heard the screams of my nephews and nieces. On rushing home I found my son lying prostrate on the ground with several wounds on his head,”  said Ms Kemunto.

She said she picked up her son and headed for the road in a desperate attempt to get him to hospital.
“On my way to the road, I saw my mother-in-law holding my younger son who had a large, gaping and bleeding wound at the back of his head. Despite my many attempts to get a response from him, he remained quiet. We managed to rush them to hospital where my son was pronounced dead on arrival,” she said.

The suspect’s husband, Mr Dennis Bosire, said he had left for work at a quarry when he was alerted by villagers of the machete attack at his home
“On arrival at my home, I found neighbours and relatives gathered with the children having been rushed to hospital. The news of my wife’s act has left me stunned. I am yet to believe that she would do such a thing,” said Mr Bosire.

The local community policing coordinator Mr James Nyaata, who confirmed the incident said he had received a call from area assistant chief Francis Masese that a woman had attacked her nephews and was still on the loose.

“Mr Masese told me the suspect had escaped from the scene of crime while wielding the murder weapon and was still a possible threat to other residents. I took a boda boda and headed towards Otamba village where she hails from. On the way, I found a crowd at a tea farm in Masongo village attacking her armed with sticks, stones and other crude weapons,” said Mr Nyaata.

He told Nation that he pleaded with the crowd in an effort to rescue her from their wrath.

“When they finally let her go, I notified officers from Itumbe Police Station who came and took her into custody. She was treated for minor injuries at Gucha Hospital and discharged before being returned to police cells,” Mr Nyaata said.

Speaking on phone, Kisii County Police commander Agnes Mudambi said police had arrested the suspect and she was assisting them with investigations.
Residents expressed their shock at the incident, terming it a tragedy that had never previously happened in the village.

“We are in shock. The assailant and her husband had a stormy relationship, characterized by frequent fights. She set her house on fire one time last year, and we only managed to put it out by luck,” said Mr John Ombati, a resident.
He alleged the suspect was known to be mentally challenged, a claim denied by community policing chief Mr Nyaata.
“I have always known the suspect to be of sound mind. Today’s incident is a big shock to all of us,” he said.
The body of the minor is at Kisii Teaching and Referral Hospital awaiting postmortem.

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8 DEFINITIVE STEPS TO GETTING A LADY’S NUMBER IN TWO MINUTES

  • In getting a girl’s number, the most essential tip I can give you first is to make eye contact with her.

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    So you just spot that girl, and you have your confidence in check, this is how you should approach her:


    Look long and straight into her eyes.

    Never look down as it is a sign of submission, timidity, and weakness. Maintaining a constant eye contact when messing with any girl also says to her that you are interested in her and that you want to get to know her. This is a pre-requisite according to women.

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    Never look at a woman’s breasts when you’re talking to her (a common mistake many men make).

    Women will reject you and consider you disrespectful if you do so.

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    Be sure to smile

    A smile sends a positive and important message. A smile says, “I will not reject you. I like you.” A smile combined with prolonged eye contact says, “I like you a lot. I want to know you. Let’s talk.” Women who smile back at you and maintain eye contact with you too are those who will be most receptive to your advances.

    Note: Raised eyebrows is also a positive signal which you should interpret as a come-on. These next few tips should help you get that number.

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    Introducing yourself.

    For example, simply say, “Oh, my name is (your Name). I’m pleased to meet you.” Just use your first name in an informal situation and both your first and last name in a more formal setting. Then allow the woman you’re picking up to offer you her name. Pause for a moment, if she doesn’t offer it, ask her what her name is.

    This is very important, USE HER NAME in the very next sentence that comes out of your mouth. Using her name works like magic to put her at ease and makes her more interested in you. A person’s name is the most important and powerful word you can ever say. The next thing you want to say or do is.

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    Compliment her.

    Call attention to some detail about her, and flatter her in a totally positive way. Be sure to say something specific, that is special about HER. Be polite and creative when dishing out compliments. The more poetic and/or dramatic you can be, the better the results you’ll get because men lust with their eyes, BUT women lust with their ears!

    A lot of guys ask me what they should talk about once they get a woman’s name and after they have complimented her. What you need to do is find out what she wants, what she desires, or what turns her on, her passion or hobby. Ask her questions about that and you will have captivated her completely.

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    Never disagree with her.

    Never disagree with a woman when you first meet her. You want to create a context of relatedness, and that’s done by agreeing with her.

     

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    Closing

    You can say something like, “I have to be going now, but I’d love to see you again so let me call you.” Without the all important phone number, you will never get anywhere with a woman. Because to score, you will need a date. To get a date, you will need the number. Just take a step forward as if you really intend to leave and turn back and say “kindly dial your phone number because I’m going to call you nine times today”, and smile while handing your phone to her.

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6 RULES FOR SUSTAINING A PEACEFUL STAY WITH YOUR ROOM MATES IN HIGHER INSTITUTION

 

 

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Living with a room mate in a higher institution doesn’t always have to be hard. People (mostly girls) complain (a lot) about their room mates and how unbearable it is to live with them. With these simple commandments if followed then there’s a higher chance you and your room mates could be besties instead of Frenemies.

 

1. THOU SHALL HAVE RESPECT FOR EACH OTHERS SPACE
Sharing one room with another person for a year can often be stressful no matter how compatible you might be as roommates, which is why giving each other space is #everything. You have to learn how to sense the other person’s mood and not get in their way at the wrong time, and hopefully your roommate will do the same.

 

2. THOU SHALL ALWAYS CLEAN THY SIDE OF THY SIDE
Sometimes you can get paired with a person who is messy and other times you’ll get someone who is a complete neat freak, but both of you have to agree on a certain level of cleanliness and maintain it.

3. ASK BEFORE YOU BORROW CLOTHES
Hey, if you end up with a roommate who lets you borrow some of the best pieces from their closet then that’s great, but don’t take advantage of such a privilege. Nobody likes it when people overstep boundaries, it definitely makes things uncomfortable! So ask before you take and always make sure to return things to their rightful owner.
Oh and share back, it’s all about giving and getting!

 

4. THOU SHANT BE PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE
Chances are you are going to get into arguments with your roommate, but the path to working things out solely relies on open communication. If either of you chooses to be passive aggressive, things can escalate and your friendship will definitely be a lot harder to mend. So choose to talk things out and share your feelings, and let the other person know what’s going through your head!

 

5. THOU SHALL CONTRIBUTE TO THE ROOM AND ALSO SHARE
If your roommate is bringing a fridge, fan, blender and a microwave for both of you to use, you have to pitch in and bring something that both of you will share. Communicate with each other before the move in day and coordinate all of the items that you will be bringing! Doing this can be fun, sharing things can bring you closer together and, of course, save you money along the way.

 

6. THOU SHALL BE NICE TO GUESTS AT ALL TIMES
Since your room isn’t just your room, you have to be considerate when you have guests over. It matters who it is, when they are coming over and how long they are staying for. While you can definitely talk things out with your roommate and come to an agreement, keep in mind that sometimes all your roommate wants to do is come back to the room, get some relaxation time in or study for the next exam.

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[STORY TIME]: JEALOUSY IS HER PRIDE

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She was down and close to drained, she needed someone to help get over these pains, but no one seems to be around, her eyes were filled with tears as she sat on the chair and her head buried in her palms. She was so disturbed that she no longer have the strength to fight back her tears, she could not believe her eyes. I am the man she has trusted, loved and supported all her life and is these how to pay her back? she did not even notice my presence in the room, even when I tried to let her notice by letting the door make loud noises, and dragged my foots on the floor, she still did not. When she didn’t realize I was in all this while, it confirmed that she was broken and it’s like she will never find the strength to rise again. She is in this critical condition and she felt like she will never be able to overcome this pain. When she raised her face the tears were gone and her face wore no expression at all, she appears so perfect and her mind was made up to go! Even when the pains lie beneath her pleasant look…

 She’s aware of my presence, she started for the door and I prevented her almost immediately she stood up. She stood still with no effort of resistance; her legs shook as she shivered, with tears dripping down her cheeks. I reached and wiped them off and she crashed into me then, I felt her warmth flowing all over me. She held still for a couple of minutes while I gave her a rub on her back with my left hand and on her head with my right hand, she sobbed and shivered increasingly then, she pushed hard towards me like she was finding a way into me and I almost fell but was saved by the walls. When she pulled back, she stared straight into my eyes that has been fixed on her since these all began and I saw her bright and blissful smiles return, a sudden rush flew into me and I shivered with unsteady legs. Just as I wanted to reach for her she crashed into me again and her pains where all GONE!.

I whispered some words I could not remember into her ears and she listened solemnly in my arms like a baby lulled  to sleep. When I said the last word in my sentence, she jerked off my arms and I got scared. When I looked into her eyes she was filled with furry, her eyes red like a tempered goddess, then the tears came dripping again. Did I hurt her again? Before I could start thinking of what I did wrong, she came towards me with full rage, raised her hands and I close my eyes braced, waiting for couple of slaps or worst, but I felt her hands soft on my cheek and it doesn’t hurt (which means it is not a slap lol) I felt her soft lips on mine, the motion flew into me and I drew her closer with my hands below her waist and she voluntarily moved closer till there was no space between my back and the wall, and the only obstacle between her and myself was the dress, then I wished ADAM never ate the apple that made human see the need for dress. I started to wish we were naked and suddenly she broke the kiss and saved me from my er0tic thoughts….

Then she spoke-: “I don’t care who she is!

Don’t ever hug a lady in the dark again!

Don’t ever open the door of a taxi for her again!

Don’t ever wait till the taxi moves again!

Don’t ever wave till the taxi is not in sight again! (And with every “don’t ever” her voice increased) and

don’t ever act so emotional with any lady again!

Don’t ever! Then I cut in and covered he lips with kiss and I let go after minutes, (with each phrase my voice went low) and I continued by saying; don’t ever forget that my sister is that lady! Don’t ever forget that she’s traveling tonight! Don’t ever forget that I wouldn’t see her years! Don’t ever forget that the streets are always dark at night in Nigeria! And then she cuts in but I was not willing to keep quiet till I made my final point and neither was she willing to keep quiet until she stops me, after minutes of saying don’t ever simultaneously. We heard ourselves chorus “Don’t ever forget that I LOVE YOU! Hands pointed at each other.

We laughed and put everything behind us.

 She is just a woman in LOVE, scared of losing the man she loved so much. she is my fiancée watching me say good bye to my sister at night……

written by: absolute kreativity

Pin:  7B14F51C

IG: @kreative-shevy

 

 

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SINGLES? 6 ASSURING THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW

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Nigerians have this bad attitude that annoys me, when they ask you about your relationship status and you tell them you’re single they start to look at you with pity as if you just told them your mum died and your house burnt. You could be a billionaire who just discovered the cure for cancer but once you’re single they see you as incomplete (because the bible and society said so, smh). They don’t care that if you date you’d be miserable, all they just want is HAVE A SPOUSE.

I’m not saying dating is bad neither am i trying to shame people who date, but we need to understand that being single can also be awesome and most people who are single can be happy. Now here are some No BS affirmation Y’all single birds need to remember

 

1. BEING SINGLE AIN’T A DISEASE
The way the online dating business and the media in general portrays single people it’s as though everyone must be in a relationship. Being single isn’t bad, wrong, sad, depressing, pathetic, or even a plague that should be eradicated. It’s simply a relationship status, and it doesn’t define you.

 

2. RELATIONSHIPS ARE QUITE HARD
If you think back to your past relationships, you can probably see just how difficult they were. I’m not saying all relationships are difficult all the time, but relationships definitely take work. It doesn’t take work to be single. So revel in that you don’t have the drama or nonsense that comes with arguing over whose turn it was to buy the damn toilet paper.

 

3. IF YOU WANTED TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP YOU’D BE
This is very true. You could go out right now, pick up someone at cinema, DM on Instagram, and land yourself a partner immediately. However, the reason you don’t do that and the reason you’re currently single is because you have standards and you’re not going to settle. You’re better than that.

 

4. BEING SINGLE HELPS THE SOUL
Just when you think you can’t take being single any longer, stop and look at your life. Sure, you don’t have a partner, but what you do you have? You have a sense of self, you’re strong, you know what you want, and you’re totally self-reliant. These are extraordinary qualities to have, not just as a single person, but for when you’re in a relationship again, too.

 

5. IT TAKES TIME TO FIND THE RIGHT PERSON
While I’m personally against the whole concept of soulmates, I believe there are right and wrong people for us. If you’re single and dating, but totally bummed out that you haven’t met someone cool in so long that you feel like you’re losing your mind, fear not. It takes time to find someone who’s right for you. Once you realize that, you can’t quit stressing about being single and understand that it takes time.

 

6. YOU WONT BE SINGLE FOREVER (PROBABLY)
If I had a kobo for every time a female friend of mine cried into a glass of wine about how she’ll be single forever, I’d be rich like Dangote. I’d also be an even richer man if I had made bets with them about it, because I’d be cashing in left and right. I won’t tell you there’s someone for everyone, because that’s an annoying cliché you don’t want to hear, but I will tell you that you won’t be single forever, so you should embrace it while you can.

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SIX STEPS TO REBUILD YOUR PARTNER’S TRUST IN YOU

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You’ve made a terrible mistake. You got caught up in a flirtation that led to an affair. Now your partner has found out and you don’t feel good. How do you rebuild your partner’s trust in you?

1. Make Your Schedule An Open Book; Call when you say you would call, be home when you say you would be home, and keep to your word.

2. Give Your Partner The Time And Space To Vent; They might cry, insult, ask many questions, hurl a great deal of judgement at you, all the while you should remain strong, stay faithful, and keep apologizing.

3. Find Out What Your Partner Needs; Do what you can to change the situation and make things better.

4. Be patient; Accept that sometimes it’s going to feel like you’re moving two steps forward and three steps back. It’s going to be frustrating. One day it seems like there’s hope for tomorrow and the next you’re back to square one. Rather than being shocked and over-reacting, be prepared to take positive action.

5. Take full Responsibility; This means taking a deep hard look at why you cheated and how you can ensure you don’t cheat again.

6. Keep your promises; To yourself and to your partner.

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#TNLIST: 6 WAYS TO MAKE YOUR MAN HAPPY

Relationships suffer hiccups because most people are quick to lay the blame on their partners; no one wants to be held responsible for the problems encountered in the relationship. Women particularly are full of complaints as they would always pinpoint the faults of the men.

Lots of women complain about the things men do in relationships, they whine and pine all day about men’s unfaithfulness and sense of insecurity they have.

At this point it should be noted that not all men cheat, there are still a few faithful ones among them who are willing to try things out with the right woman.

Yes, the right woman! This would lead us to the behaviors women often display in relationships. Some women honestly have to work on themselves as they do not have what it takes to hold a man down. Some of them lack the basic morals and cultural values a typical Nigerian man wants in his woman.

As much as men are driven by testosterone, they have certain specifications they want the women they would end up with to possess. Everything does not have to be about the men and the things they do.

Sometimes, women need to work hard and find ways to make their men happy. A Nigerian man who is truly happy in a relationship would always want to be with that special woman that sends his whole body on fire.

Find below some of the things you can always do to make that your  man happy:

1. Show him love

Oblivious to the fact that your girlfriends think your man would take you for a fool if you let him know you love him, do not suppress your emotions.

Do not be afraid to show your man how much you love him; giving in to talks and advises like this would only douse your love and leave you weak when it is time to put up a fight for him.

However, be fierce while you pour out the love in your heart; this would show that as much as you love recklessly, you can also become wild when your anger is fueled. Some Nigerian men appreciate women they find mysterious.

2. Support him

Relationships are not just about the good times alone; there are moments when the wind would blow and you would hear the demon in his roar.

Do not let this move you an inch; your support during his moment of trials would earn you his respect and make him love you the more when he steps out of that phase. A typical Nigerian man wants a woman who would lend him all the support he needs to achieve his goals.

3. Give him his space

As much as you are in love with a man, you should learn to give him his space. Do not encroach his privacy, give him time to think and reflect on issues.

If you keep playing a girlfriend, wife, and mother to him at the same time you may be testing his patience. You would be able to make your man happy if you take your time to study the tides and know his low and high seasons.

This would also help you to know him better. Watch out for those hot little whores that are always looking out for other ladies’ men.

4. Feed him well

Nigerian men do not joke with their stomach. Ensure that you feed that Nigerian man you are dating well and you can be sure half of your problems would be taken away.

Make sure you see to his well-being as it would keep him happy and glued to you. Men are not as bad as you think they are; all you need to do is let them see the good in you and they would stay with you as long as they keep getting that happiness and peace.

5. Stay in shape

A Nigerian man wants a woman he could boast of when he is with friends. Even if you are sweet, pleasant, well cultured and respectful, you have to stay in shape.

No one is asking you to have a Coca-Сola shape if you are on the big side, you can still be fabulous even as you. Dress smartly, pay special attention to your hair, ensure you look pretty always and he would remain attracted to you.

6. Play dirty with him

Men get bored at times, they get tired of the norm and want something outside the pack. This could be weird but they would hit on other girls in order to feel like they are still in the game when they are tired.

In order to keep your man and make him happy at the same time, you can flirt with him at times. Let him see different shades of you; this would generate sparks and add passion to your affair.

Stop being rigid and oblige him when he wants to play an intimate game with you. However, do not do things that are below standard or things that would put your integrity at stake. Do not turn yourself into a puppy while seeing to a man’s happiness. Your happiness matters too.